Trying Again
by Klutzygirl33
Summary: Spoilers up to "Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word". A few months after they reconcile, Arizona and Callie decide to try again for another baby.


**I don't own Grey's Anatomy and never will. No copyright infringement intended.**

_Warning_: Mentions of past miscarriage.

* * *

Months after their reconciliation, Arizona actually broached the subject first during a counseling session with Callie. They had talked about her pregnancy and subsequent marriage before, but hadn't discussed the possibility of trying again. She thought maybe they were both scared to mention it. She looked down at her hands nervously before looking back up. "I want to try again for another baby."

That thrilled Callie, but she was also scared and a little wary after what had happened last time. "Are you sure? I don't want you going into this when you're not hundred percent certain about getting pregnant again."

She nodded. "I want to do this again, Calliope. I'm ready." Arizona was terrified about miscarrying again, but she and Callie were working on their marriage now. They weren't in the place they were in before everything got fucked up.

Callie beamed at her. "Then I'm ready too. We're in a good place now." She leaned over and briefly kissed her wife.

Their therapist interrupted them during their moment of giddiness. "Arizona, what made you change your mind about another pregnancy?"

"I've been thinking about it for weeks now and I've been talking about what this means to my own therapist. I didn't want to bring it up to Callie unless I was completely sure and now I am. Yes, the miscarriage fucked me up even more, but I should have gotten help. I didn't realize I needed it before. And Callie and I are in a good place now. I want another baby and a house."

The therapist smiled. "That is great news. Callie, how are you feeling about this?"

"Surprised, but happy. We really haven't had anything good in our lives for a long time. It's been a rough two years, but I know we'll be great." Callie couldn't contain her excitement anymore and put her arm around Arizona.

A week later, after they had an appointment with the fertility specialist they had used last night, the process of trying to conceive started all over again. The hormones threw Arizona out of whack, but Callie had prepared herself for this because it was the same last time. Arizona apologized profusely to her wife for her behavior and she forgave her. It was nothing compared to what had been said and thrown in her face before anyway.

"I'm going to have to go through this for nine months and it is going to suck," Arizona complained to Callie while they were in bed one night.

"Yup. Welcome to my life when I was pregnant with Sofia. I can't believe you put up with me." Callie laughed when Arizona punched her in the shoulder.

Arizona looked down, suddenly getting serious. "What if I miscarry for a second time? I want to do this – want to be pregnant and carry your baby – but I'm scared."

And that's when Callie came up with an idea. "Why don't you talk to Meredith? She miscarried before and went on to have a successful pregnancy with baby Bailey. Maybe she can reassure you that you'll be fine."

Arizona was a little wary of letting anyone know about their plans, but dealing with it on their own last time had been their downfall. So she agreed to talk to Meredith whenever she got the chance, which happened to be the next day. "Can I talk to you in private for a second?" she asked.

Meredith had no idea why Arizona needed to talk to her, but agreed. "Sure." She followed Arizona into an on-call room. "What's going on?"

Arizona took a deep breath before she started talking. "Last year, before I cheated, Callie and I decided to have another baby. We went through the entire process and I got pregnant, but there was no heartbeat during the first ultrasound." Even now the memory shot a spike of pain through her heart. "I was wondering how you dealt with your fear when you got pregnant again. And no, I'm not pregnant yet, but we're trying."

Meredith was shocked, but really happy that they were trying (she was also thrilled that Callie and Arizona had worked through their problems enough to get to this point in their lives). "Wow. Well, I am sorry about your miscarriage. They fucking suck. What did your doctor say about why you miscarried?"

Arizona played with a hangnail as she spoke. "That it was nothing I did and that these things just happened. I can successfully carry a pregnancy to term."

She smiled. "That's great news! You're already better off than I was. I have a hostile uterus and it's pretty lucky that I was able to carry Bailey in the first place. And these things do just happen sometimes. I was terrified for nearly the entire pregnancy, but after a while, I refused to let the fear ruin my life. It's not worth it. And I got a healthy baby out of it in the end. So don't worry, Arizona. You'll be fine. You and Callie will be great and Sofia will be an amazing big sister."

Arizona felt a lot better now and she surprised both of them by hugging Meredith. "Thank you for the pep talk."

Meredith laughed. "You're welcome. Now good luck and congratulations! Go make a baby with your wife."

Arizona laughed too and then went back to work. Meredith talking to her had really assured her fears, something she was so grateful about she ended up buying her a present later for her help.

She and Callie decided to put off buying a house until after she was pregnant and into the second trimester because they didn't want to get ahead of themselves again. They were trying to think positively, however, a recommendation from both Arizona's therapist and their marriage counselor. It helped them out when they were drowning in negativity.

They agreed to attempt two turns at IVF and if neither took, they would think about adoption. Giving a child a home seemed like a wonderful idea to them (and one they decided to consider in the future even if a pregnancy took). Fortunately for them - just like the last time - the first try worked. Callie supported Arizona as she took the pregnancy test this time. She grabbed Arizona's hand and squeezed it before the results appeared, however. "Whatever that test says, know that we will be fine and we will get through it. You're not alone in this. Don't ever think you are."

Arizona nervously smiled at her and squeezed back. "I know. Don't think that you're alone either." When the timer rang, she picked up the test and giggled. "It's positive! We're going to have another baby, Calliope!"

Callie laughed with her. "We're going to have another baby!" Like before, she placed her hand on Arizona's still-flat abdomen. "Hi baby. I'm one of your mommies. Stay safe in there, okay? We love you very much and want you so bad." She looked up at her wife. "I love you, Arizona."

"I love you too, Calliope." Arizona had been pregnant before (for a few weeks, but it still counted because the pain still hit her randomly), but it was still weird to experience it again. The morning sickness was worse than last time (supposedly a good sign, which she was grateful for) and slightly annoying. Especially when it struck at random times.

Unsurprisingly, Meredith and Cristina (who was due to leave soon) figured out she was pregnant first. "Your boobs are bigger," Cristina pointed out when Arizona asked her how she knew.

Arizona looked down and sure enough, she was right. She knew Callie would appreciate that, but she was still too sick to even think about sex. "Thanks?"

"My pleasure." Cristina smirked and walked away.

"Congratulations. How are you feeling?" Meredith was really excited for Callie and Arizona and hoped this pregnancy went smoothly. They deserved to have good things happen to them.

"Thank you. Aside from the constant nausea and vomiting, I actually good. I'm also really tired all the time." Another side effect she really disliked.

"Well, get used to the tired thing. Derek and I didn't sleep for months after Bailey was born – we were pretty lucky to have Callie around to help, actually. But hey, he's finally sleeping through the night." There were a few sleepless nights, but they were pretty rare now. Meredith and Derek took turns alternating those nights (if they were home) because it was much easier.

"Oh God, I forgot about the sleepless nights we went through after Sofia was born." Arizona didn't know why – maybe because they were grateful their little girl had survived her premature birth? They never really complained about the sleepless nights too much back then.

Meredith swooped in for a hug, surprising both of them and congratulated her again before going back to work.

Right before the first ultrasound, Arizona panicked just a little and called her therapist for an emergency session. Callie went along as moral support because she didn't want her to be alone.

"Arizona, it's perfectly fine to panic after what you went through last time. But no matter what happens, you are not alone. Callie is there with you this time. And your friend Meredith knows what you are going through, and she's supportive, correct?"

Arizona nodded. "She and I are friends now since we went through similar experiences." Meredith's miscarriage may have been caused by trauma and her hostile uterus and Arizona's was for another reason entirely, but both women had felt the same pain.

"That's good. You'll be okay. Come see me if the worst happens, which I don't think it will." The therapist smiled.

The next day, Callie was with Arizona this time for the first ultrasound. Their doctor smiled at the two women as he moved the wand around. The sound of a heartbeat filled the air within seconds. "You hear that, Arizona? That's our baby."

"Is the baby healthy?" Arizona was in awe of the heartbeat. It sounded so strong.

The doctor squinted and moved the wand around again. The heartbeat got louder. "Just as I suspected. The babies are healthy."

Both Callie and Arizona froze. "Did you just say babies?" Arizona questioned.

"Yes, I did. Congratulations, you're having twins!" He smiled at them.

"Two babies. Twins!" Callie was in shock and she knew Arizona had to feel the same way.

She definitely was. She had been hoping for the best, but preparing for the worst. And for some reason, twins had never crossed her mind. But Arizona was actually happy about this. "Holy shit." Now they definitely need to find a (big) house.

The doctor printed off the ultrasound and sent the two women on their way. Meredith cornered them in the parking lot. "So, how did it go? You don't look unhealthy. Maybe in shock, though. What happened?"

Callie went for it. "The ultrasound went fine. We heard both heartbeats and the twins are fine." She wasn't disappointed by their friend's reaction.

Meredith's mouth dropped open and Arizona handed her the sonogram picture. "Wow. Congratulations, you two." She hugged them, handed the picture back, and then returned to work.

Despite their good and shocking news, Callie and Arizona waited to buy the house they loved. Once she hit her fourteenth week of pregnancy with no problems, they went ahead and bought it. The next week, they told their friends and family about the twins. They weren't shocked about that – many of them had suspected for weeks (and Callie enjoyed Leah fuming in a corner) – but they were surprised about the fact the two women were having twins.

"Good luck with a toddler and two newborns." Alex smirked at them, but he was thrilled for Callie and Arizona. They deserved this.

When the twins kicked and Callie was able to feel it for the first time, she actually broke down in tears. "Are you sure you're not the one pregnant?" Arizona joked.

Callie gave her a look before putting her hand on Arizona's stomach (the only one allowed to do so. She made an intern cry once when they tried it). "Hi, babies. It's Mommy. How are you treating your mama? Be good." She and Arizona both laughed when one of the twins kicked. "You're glowing, you know that?"

"I don't know about that. I'm eighteen weeks along and I feel fat." Arizona knew it was only going to get worse, too.

"Nah, you're pregnant. There's a difference. You're carrying our children, baby. There's nothing more beautiful than that."

Arizona cried after that, which she later denied (she hated the mood swings). When it came time to find out the sex of the babies, both Callie and Arizona declined. They wanted surprise deliveries. And it was right around this time that Sofia figured there was something unusual going on with her mama. She chewed on her lip and stared at Arizona. "Fat?"

Callie grimaced and went to correct her daughter, but stopped herself. "Do you think it's time we tell her?"

Arizona had been hesitant to tell their daughter before because of her history, but now was the time. "Yeah. Sofia, let's sit down, baby." She sat down on the couch and encouraged the little girl to come over.

Sofia sat down in between her mothers and stared at Arizona. "Why you fat, Mama?"

Callie cringed again while Arizona tried to remember that she was just a little girl who didn't realize what was happening (or that it was rude, they'd have to talk to Sofia about that later). "Well, I'm not fat, baby girl. You know how Zola has Bailey as a baby brother?"

Sofia nodded. "Yes."

"Well, Mommy and I are going to have two babies. You're going to be a big sister! Isn't that awesome?"

"Babies?" Sofia understood babies, but Zola only had one. Two of them was beyond her comprehension.

Callie took over from there. "Yup, two of them. They're called twins. Are you excited about becoming a big sister like Zola?"

Sofia nodded. "Yes."

"Well, that's wonderful then." Arizona kissed the top of her daughter's head and beamed.

In Arizona's twenty-ninth week of pregnancy, the three of them finally moved into their brand-new, five bedroom house. It suited them. This way, they'd have room for all three of their children and a guest if need be. Alex, Derek, Jackson, and others pitched in to help since Arizona couldn't do much work (which she felt bad about, but she conceded Callie's point that she probably wouldn't have been able to help out too much anyway if it had just been her leg). She sat down on the couch and refused to budge. With the weight gain, she had to get a new prosthetic leg that was pretty helpful. She'd go back to the old one once she lost all the weight from the pregnancy.

That night, after they settled in and Sofia was in her new room (which she loved), Callie sat down next to her wife. "How are you feeling?"

"Exhausted, but that's nothing new. My ankle is swollen and it's bothering me," she admitted.

"Why didn't you say something before? I'm supposed to help you out with this kind of stuff." She started rubbing Arizona's ankle. It felt nice and she melted into it. "Thank you so much, Calliope."

"You don't have to thank me. I love doing this for you, especially since you did it during my pregnancy." Callie grinned and kissed her.

The next few months passed by pretty slowly for Callie and Arizona. They couldn't wait for the twins' appearance and fought over names many times. Callie had been granted exclusive naming rights for Sofia after everything she went through, but this time they worked together. And they decided that each got to pick a name since there were two of them this time (although both had veto rights if they didn't like the name).

Arizona was two days past her due date and miserable beyond belief (she kinda loved pregnancy, but she vowed never to put herself through this again) when she showed up at the hospital to visit Callie to take her out to lunch. "I don't know how you're doing so well at this," Alex observed.

"Same here." Arizona went to say something else, but was interrupted by a sharp pain that lanced across her abdomen.

The look on her face made Alex stop dead in his tracks. "Was that a contraction?"

Arizona nodded. "My back's been hurting for hours. Could that have been early labor?"

"Yeah. Callie's in surgery – which you already know – but do you want me to send somebody up to get her?" Alex questioned.

She shook her head. "This surgery is pretty important and right now, it's just early labor. Why don't you take me up to the maternity ward?"

Alex agreed and held her up when another contraction rose up seven minutes later. He went to head back to work when Arizona stopped him. "No, you're staying with me." She would have gotten Meredith as her support if she also wasn't in surgery.

He really didn't want to do this, but he realized he had to. "Fine." He returned to her side and let Arizona hold his hand when the contractions got to be too much for her. He asked if she wanted an epidural, but Arizona refused. She was determined to do this naturally. Alex was her support for several hours.

When another, very strong contraction assailed her, Arizona screamed. "Fuck. Fuck this, hurts. I want Callie." She desperately needed her wife by her side.

Alex called an intern in and sent her to get Callie. Fortunately for them, her surgery was wrapping up. She rushed to her wife's side immediately. "You're doing great, Arizona. Why did no get me sooner?"

"I didn't want to bother you," Arizona explained, stopped to moan as another contraction built up. Callie grabbed her hand and let her squeeze it as hard as she could.

At 8:56PM, Arizona delivered an upset and crying little girl. Her brother followed at 9:04PM, also furious with his entrance into the world. "They're amazing." Arizona was in awe. She had felt the same way after Sofia's birth, but there had mostly been concern and fear about her and Callie's health.

"I'm so proud of you, Arizona." Callie couldn't stop staring at the twins. She was so happy to be a mom again. "So how do you feel about your entire pregnancy experience now that you've given birth?" She was curious.

Arizona shifted the little boy around. "Well, I don't regret any of my experience – these two are so worth everything I went through – but I never want to do it again."

Callie laughed. "I don't blame you. Now, you want to let the very impatient peanut gallery in?" At Arizona's nods, she waved everybody in.

"Wow. They're so tiny." Meredith congratulated them as she shifted Sofia around so she could see the twins. "What are their names?" She had been dying to find out for months.

"Well, Callie is holding Wyatt Carlos Mark Robbins-Torres. I named him. And I am holding Lola Juliet Hope Robbins-Torres. Callie named her." They had debated for months on the perfect names and had even come up with several different choices in case they had two girls or two boys.

Alex was the first to say something. "Wow, those are some long-ass names." At Callie, Arizona, and Meredith's glares, he shrugged. "What? You were all thinking it."

"As you can tell, we had a hard time choosing a good name. We actually considered using Juliet as a first name, but decided against it. And Hope – which is exactly what we needed these past two years – is too cliché for a first name. So we decided to use them as middle names. Everyone's just going to call them Lola and Wyatt anyway so it doesn't really matter."

"They're wrinkly," Sofia proclaimed.

Her mothers laughed. "You were wrinkly when you were born too. You want to see your brother and sister?"

At Sofia's nod, Meredith lowered her down. "You have to be really gentle with your little brother and sister, okay? They're not as strong as you."

"Okay." And much to everyone's delight, Sofia gave the twins kisses (which was luckily captured on camera by a quick thinking Derek).

The hospital discharged Arizona and the twins two days later. For the first time, the new family of five was alone in the house. "Our lives are crazy now, but no regrets," Arizona told Callie as they collapsed into bed after taking care of two screaming newborns.

"Same here. We worked hard to get to this point in our lives and nothing can take our three children away from us."

"I love you, Calliope. And I love Sofia, Lola, and Wyatt so much." Her heart had expanded so much and she couldn't wait to see how their kids grew up.

"I love the four of you so fucking much, Arizona." Callie brushed the hair out of her wife's face before kissing her.

The amputation and miscarriage had taken a toll on Arizona (and subsequently, Callie) but the two had moved past it. Sure there were still bad days, but they were few and far between now. Life was going pretty good for them, even on the nights they never thought they'd sleep. And four years after Wyatt and Lola's births, Callie and Arizona completed their family with the adoption of a six month old named Jasper. They had come out the other side of their problem stronger than they had ever been before.


End file.
